Miscarriage Insight
“I’m realizing… of course the loss was extremely painful. But that pregnancy, as short as it was, was a real blessing in my life.”
All Grief is Valid
Nothing. There is nothing wrong with you. You’re grieving the loss of a your baby - one that you desperately wanted and were praying for.
Do I Need Therapy?
We’ve spent a lot of time discussing many different aspects of this, touching on topics like support groups, medication, setting boundaries, toxic positivity, self care, etc.
Pregnant After Loss Tips
“Can you share some tips about how to get through pregnancy after loss? I am 6 weeks pregnant now and a mess. It’s just so hard to get through the day.”
Endometriosis Message
“176 million women live with endometriosis and I am one of them. To me, this enigmatic and commonly misunderstood disease is a symbol of so much more than a simple illness.”
My Secret Menorah
“My secret menorah Magical oil Lit every night for months In secret The trigger shot. That lights them all... My secret menorah.”
My Chanukah Miracle
Two years ago, we found out about my third miscarriage on the second day of Chanukah. Lighting the candles after that felt, not for the first time in my life, like a cruel joke.
Grief With a Partner
Just because there are two people in a relationship and they go through exactly the same thing, it doesn’t mean that they will feel the same way about it, or grieve as long.
This is Grief
Grief is so many things. But it is not linear. It will not obey your internal timeline. It will not end because society says that it should. Grief has a mind of its own because grief is love.
This is Pregnancy After Loss
Pregnancy after loss is all of these things and more: getting through 40 weeks… 1 day at at a time. Celebrating today while worrying about tomorrow.
Supporting Someone Pregnant After Loss
Watching someone go through pregnancy after loss is really hard, in a way that’s both similar and different to the experience of losing a baby.
Look In My Eyes
Yes - we know repeated ourselves... because ANYTHING stressful can make you gain or lose weight. Losing 20 pounds = you don't know the reasons behind it.
We See You
We see you. You are not a monster. You are a person just trying to get through another day in pain. You are a human being. Be kind to your aching heart.
Toxic Positivity
No matter how many times you tell someone this, it’s just not the way to happiness. It’s the same as forcing the “good vibes only” or “just keep going” shtick. It doesn’t work.
Other’s Coping Mechanisms
We shouldn't judge people's responses to pain from what they are choosing to show to the world. But... (and here's the big "but" - you knew it was coming!)
Working on Grief
First you need to manage the pain, then you have to learn with crutches, eventually you may need a little physical therapy after the cast comes off and finally you start walking again.
The Void
One of our followers sent this in, and we’re feeling this hard today. Sigh. The void. It’s inescapable, but all you want to do is crawl your way out.
Permission to Grieve
And what I realized this week, is: It is my right to grieve this. I don’t have to learn to be okay with this. I can grieve the loss, not just of my pregnancies, but the loss of what I dreamt my family to be.
Giving Space
Our suggestion👉🏻 Let him tell you to bleep off and leave him alone. A good friend means never being upset when they tell you that they need space.
Just One Word: Sad
What happens when you’re longing and longing, and the rainbow still isn’t here? And each day feels like the very possibility is slipping through your fingers?