Swipe to read through this follower’s personal story about the adoption of her children and her journey in raising them ❤️

Adoption | Jewish adoptee | domestic adoption | fertility clinic | infertility

What are some things that Jewish adoptees and families wish their communities knew?

The Adoption and Jewish Identity Project @adoptionjewishidentity produced this insight which was borne out of research they did, from surveys and oral histories they took from a diverse group of Jewish adoptees raised in American Jewish families.

Swipe to see our take on it.

Adoption | Jewish adoptee | Jewish identity | just adopt | international adoption | Jewish family | inclusivity | orthodox Jewish life | infertility

Even if you choose to adopt, there is nothing that is simple about the process.

We share these complexities so you can arm yourselves, knowing what may lie ahead, and for all of you out there who know people in your life who have adopted or are considering it—> Please be kind.

Even after people adopt, there can be lingering grief and trauma around the so many of these issues.

Adoption | Jewish adoptees | don’t say just adopt | infertility | fertility journey | Jewish community

How does one move on from here? While her story is unique, there are so many pieces that are not. The fear. The pain. The loss of control. Powerlessness. Feeling that your body betrayed you. The unknown.

This is the a story of molar pregnancy. Please read with kindness and sensitivity in your heart, because this woman is in deep pain.

Read one woman's story about an extopic pregnancy and needing mental health support 10 years later because of the trauma it caused.

“I first started having symptoms back when I got my first period at 13. Ever since then, I remember excruciating pain and my Dr telling me to take 2 days off from school.”

“176 million women live with endometriosis and I am one of them. To me, this enigmatic and commonly misunderstood disease is a symbol of so much more than a simple illness.”

Not everyone felt miracles, joy, or light.
Some of us barely lit candles.
Some of us ate donuts alone.
Some of us felt invisible while everyone else posted miracles.

If you’re going through something hard and feeling hopeless, we see you.

Chanuka -| Hanukkah | infertility | fertility struggles| IVF | iui | miscarriage | pregnancy loss | Jewish | TFMR | Jewish woman

One flame changed everything 🕎

Now we’re taking that energy and stretching it across the Jewish world.
We’re expanding programs, support groups, and training for leaders.

We’re ready to reach farther—if you’ll help fuel the glow.
🔗 in bio to give.

Chanukah | happy Hanukkah | be the light | eight days of light | infertility support | fertility journey | here for you | testimonials

“Gosh it’s so eerie to find comfort from my own words from the past. Please do share ❤️”

This piece was written by Malki Rodal @theoutbackmama in 2023 - swipe to read the beautiful and touching words to her son.

Chanukah | happy Hanukkah | 8 days of light | spread the light | Jewish joy | fertility support | infertility community | Jewish community

Hanukkah, happy, Hanukkah, pregnancy loss, infant loss, grief, Grief during holidays, holidays are hard, fertility journey

Infertility is making huge efforts and they don’t necessarily pay off in the way we hoped – and the pain is real

infertility, fertility journey, pregnancy, loss, miscarriage, emotional journey, fertility support

Waiting and waiting and waiting

For what feels like forever.
It’s not fair, but you are not alone 🫂

grief, pregnancy, loss, miscarriage, early miscarriage, infertility, fertility, treatment, fertility journey, TTC, IVF

Infertility is… all of this 🫂

Infertility support, fertility clinic, fertility, treatment, miscarriage, steel birth, IVF, egg retrieval, genetic testing

Here are some grief books we recommend

Thank you to this follower for sharing this beautifully devastating poem 💔🫂

So many ups. So many more downs.

Thank you to this follower for sharing her story 🫂

I read this quote earlier in the week, and couldn’t help thinking about PAL, because it’s all about bravery and courage, every single day, every single hour, every single minute.

PAL | pregnant after loss | fertility journey | infertility journey | pregnancy loss | jew | Jewish

You are going to get through this.
You are going to get through this.
You are going to get through this.

Promise ❤️

Pregnancy after loss | pregnant after loss | pregnancy after infertility | Jewish | Jewish woman | recurrent loss | miscarriage | stillbirth | TFMR

This is what pregnancy after loss looks like.

Raw. Unfiltered.

The anxiety, guilt, and worry are so strong. We fight to feel that hope and trust in Gd that this time will be different, but it’s hard.

We are praying for all of you.

Pregnancy after loss | pregnancy anxiety | life after infertility | grief | hope | infertility | miscarriage | infant loss

So many of you have written about your relationships and marriages being strained through the journey of infertility or after a loss, that it’s worth mentioning here.

“I’ve never told a single soul this, but the biggest reason I don’t want to do IVF is because I don’t think my marriage is strong enough to endure it.”

“Yet, we don't have kids to play with their kids at shabbos meals, go to afternoon activities with, or go to museums with. We have tried to fit in, but maybe it's better to not even try.”

Have you heard of spoon theory? It’s the idea that pain, whether emotional or physical, and chronic illness impact a person’s ability to do different daily activities and that each activity costs a certain amount of “spoons”.

Healthy people have unlimited spoons each day and don’t need to think twice about how to use their spoons. But people experiencing pain, chronic illness, or infertility have to be aware of how many spoons they have each day and plan accordingly.

This might look like saying no to Chanukah parties in order to save spoons for making and eating dinner that night.

Spoon theory empowers people to set boundaries to safeguard their mental and physical wellbeing. It’s a reminder to save some spoons to take care of yourself.

We have a limited amount of spoons each day - don’t use any on people or situations that bring you down and wear you out.

Do you think spoon theory is a helpful tool for you? What are some “spoons” you chose to do this time of year?

Spoon theory, self-care, boundaries, infertility, fertility treatment, workplace culture, worklife balance, pregnancy loss, stillbirth

When you’re struggling to build your family, it’s so easy to get caught in a cycle of judgment. We judge ourselves for not being “strong enough.” We judge our partners. We judge friends who mean well but say the wrong thing. Sometimes, we even judge life itself for being so unfair.

This journey can send us into panic and desperation, riding an emotional rollercoaster that takes our self-esteem up and down. And before we know it, we’re stuck in the blame game—blaming ourselves, others, or anyone in reach.

As we enter the holidays, we want to invite you to think about forgiveness—not as some grand, sweeping gesture, but as a gentle starting point. Forgiving ourselves for not being perfect. Forgiving others for fumbling their words or not understanding. Forgiving the idea that this process has to look a certain way.

Take a moment to recognize just how much you’ve already carried. Remind yourself that you’re human, and you’ve shown tremendous strength in simply continuing forward, no matter how hard it’s been.
And one more thing: please forgive us, too. We know we haven’t always been everything you needed this year.

💔Sometimes your messages went unanswered, or took too long.

💔Sometimes a program, a post, or a speaker didn’t land right.

💔Sometimes our words might have hurt when we wanted them to comfort.

For those moments, we are deeply sorry. Our intention has always been to hold you with love and remind you that you are seen and not alone.

Xoxo,
Aimee

Forgiveness | high holidays | Yom Kippur | fertility support | Jewish fertility | Jewish holiday | day of forgiveness | ivf | miscarriage | stillbirth

This time of year is so complex and filled with such a mix of emotions. This submission so beautifully captures what’s been on our hearts during these weeks.

Infertility and loss community | fertility journey | Jewish women | high holidays | hope | infertility life

We’ve unpacked it all when it comes to surrogacy—one episode at a time.

Because let’s be real—family-building isn’t a ‘just’ situation. Every journey is unique, and kindness goes a long way.

Surrogacy, infertility, and loss can feel so isolating.

Thank you to the follower who sent us this letter ❤️‍🩹 it so eloquently captures our emotions right now.

Infertility | pregnancy and infant loss | miscarriage | stillbirth | ivf | fertility journey | fertility support

You might feel an instinct when meeting someone new to ask, “So, how many kids to you have?” or “Do you have kids?”

🚨DON’T🚨

Please, stop asking people about their kids, if they want kids, or how many kids they have.

For people in the fertility community, these questions are an incredibly hurtful, heartbreaking and triggering for struggling to build their family or grieving the loss of a pregnancy or baby. Such an “innocent” question is the source for so much pain.

So please, next time you want to ask someone about their family, try -

“Tell me about your family.”

❤️5 Ways To Ask, But Not Ask “Do You Have Kids?”❤️

❤️When you are meeting someone for the first time… “Ah, you just moved in! Welcome to the neighborhood. So, who lives in that big house with you?”

The mikvah can be a deeply emotional experience—especially for those navigating infertility, loss, or pain. Even well-meaning comments can unintentionally cause hurt.

This post is a gentle reminder: when in doubt, keep it simple.
Be supportive. Be respectful. Most importantly, be quiet when silence is more healing than words.