
Fertility Resource Library
Browse all of our supportive content across a variety of topics. Whether you’re looking to feel validated, need advice, or just need a break, we’ve got something for everyone.
In a recent IWSTHAB survey, participants shared how our resources have supported their fertility journeys:
89% said that IWSTHAB helped them know where to turn and feel more empowered to seek support and resources.
93% would recommend IWSTHAB’s resources to others in the Jewish community on a fertility journey.
This Resource Library is a big piece of what people use during their struggles, so please let us know if you think we are missing any topics.
Jump to:
Adoption • Body Image • Cancer • Childless Not By Choice • Circumstantial Infertility • Donor Conception • Ectopic and Molar Pregnancy • Egg Freezing • Emotional Support • Endometriosis • Genetics • Grief • Holidays • How to Support • Humor • Infertility • IUI • IVF • LGBTQ+ • Male Factor Infertility • Mikvah, Niddah & Intimacy • Miscarriage • PCOS • Personal Stories • Pregnancy After Loss • Pregnancy Announcements • Recurrent Loss • Relationships and Friendships • Religion and Faith • Secondary Infertility • Self-Care • Singles • Single Mothers By Choice • Stillbirth • Surrogacy • Termination for Medical Reasons • Third Party Reproduction •
Adoption
Rachel Shanken joins Aimee Baron, MD to talk about her journey to becoming an adoptive parent, something she never envisioned herself doing, the heartbreaking conversation as a single woman in her 30s when her doctors said that she may never have biological children and how she got married, but then struggled through the ups and downs of umpteen failed cycles to try to get pregnant.
What are some things that Jewish adoptees and families wish their communities knew?
This eye-opening resource comes from the Adoption and Jewish Identity Project @adoptionjewishidentity which was borne out of research they did, from surveys and oral histories they took from a diverse group of Jewish adoptees raised in American Jewish families.
Many people consider adoption not because they ran out of options.
They adopt because they want to give a child a loving home.
Body Image
Rachel Goldberg LMFT, PMH joins Aimee Baron, MD to talk about binge and restrictive eating habits and how that can affect fertility, the reasons why disordered eating or exercise can cause fertility issues, the guilt and shame that go along with this these diagnoses, and the small changes suggestions people can make to try to get them out of a destructive feeding pattern.
Reva Schlanger Peyser MS, RD, CDN joins Aimee Baron, MD to talk about a myriad of issues surrounding fertility in regard to body image and eating disorders, how people feel like their body is failing them during the struggle to build a family and how people might use eating, nutrition, exercise to try to take back some control.
There are many different ways our relationship with our body changes because of all that we go through to grow our family. It’s normal to struggle with the changes your body goes through along the way.
Cancer
This story gives an insight into one woman’s feelings as she prepares for her last visit to the mikvah (ritual bath), a necessity in orthodox communities before husband and wife reunite.
Here is a woman’s story of a surgery to remove a tumor that ended in hysterectomy and her feelings about no longer being able to have her own children afterwards.
“After denying that anything was wrong and then realizing that so much was wrong, I spent the next few months going to doctors and and getting tests.”
Childless Not By Choice
This is why we share voices from the community.
To tell the untold stories. Every person has their own journey with fertility. Some have happy endings… and some don’t.
Part of mental health is also acknowledging that you may not be where you want to be eventually, but you still have to take care of yourself here — now.
Whether you are pushing yourself to attend this something or whether you're staying in to avoid all the negative feelings that come when you do show up, we see you.
Circumstantial Infertility
Thank you so much to @sam_ster_ela for sharing her circumstantial infertility story with us. We’re holding you and everyone dealing with this pain 🫂🫂🫂
It doesn't change the fact that I wish I didn't need to be on birth control. That my vision of having a large family isn't realistic for me. That I am dealing with a mental illness.
“This condition requires me to take medication. I would absolutely love to try to expand my family, but the medication I take isn't conducive to pregnancy.”
Donor Conception
Parents who are choosing to use a donor for their child are thinking exactly the same way. They want to be parents more than they want to share their DNA.
These are some of the things that parents think about when considering using a donor (and things that other people think when you share you are going the donor route)
"We failed 11 IVF's at 4 different prominent fertility clinics with my own eggs, before we even considered donor eggs- what a difference it is going for a transfer being pretty confident that I'll end up pregnant!"
Ectopic and Molar Pregnancy
How does one move on from here? While her story is unique, there are so many pieces that are not. The fear. The pain. The loss of control. Powerlessness. Feeling that your body betrayed you. The unknown.
This is the a story of molar pregnancy. Please read with kindness and sensitivity in your heart, because this woman is in deep pain.
Read one woman's story about an extopic pregnancy and needing mental health support 10 years later because of the trauma it caused.
Egg Freezing
We’re reflecting on the many thoughts and emotions that come with egg freezing. These are merely a handful.
Ellie Levi, joins Aimee Baron, MD to talk about her story of becoming a SIM: Single Intentional Mom to her 3 year old daughter, Ayelet HaShachar, her thought process and emotions about each stage of the process and the experience of being one of the first to her freeze eggs in her community.
Sometimes, the hardest part of the journey is sitting with the grief, acknowledging the feelings, and giving yourself space to process. 💔
Especially as an older single navigating decisions like egg freezing or considering becoming a single mother by choice, know that your emotions are valid and processing it all takes time. Don’t push yourself to make a decision quickly. Be gentle as you come to terms with this next stage of your life.
Emotional Support
Remember to take care of yourself during the wait… even if all you really want to do is hide in bed and take a test every hour.
Mother’s Day is hard. There’s a million questions, and barely any answers.
Who is a mother to you?
Mother’s Day can be complicated, and love is in the little things.
Endometriosis
Rachel Daar Cohen joins Aimee Baron, MD to talk about a powerful, raw, and deeply emotional story of resilience after a tremendous amount of struggle, her struggle with infertility, trauma, grief, addiction, and endometriosis and how kindness is so important as we never know what people are really going through.
“I first started having symptoms back when I got my first period at 13. Ever since then, I remember excruciating pain and my Dr telling me to take 2 days off from school.”
“176 million women live with endometriosis and I am one of them. To me, this enigmatic and commonly misunderstood disease is a symbol of so much more than a simple illness.”
Genetics
Navigating fertility and genetic challenges can be overwhelming, and the emotions that come with them are just as complex.
Podcast Collaboration with Jscreen
It’s hard to put all 5,000 thoughts that run through our minds during the two week wait into one graphic. But we tried to capture the essence.
Grief
Waiting.
Waiting.
More waiting.
For what feels like forever.
Here are some grief books we recommend
Children’s books we recommend
Holidays
Mother’s Day is hard. There’s a million questions, and barely any answers.
Who is a mother to you?
Mother’s Day can be complicated, and love is in the little things.
Send love.💗
Send support. 🤗
Send hugs 🫂
…to some of the people who need it most this holiday
How to Support
Mother’s Day is hard. There’s a million questions, and barely any answers.
Who is a mother to you?
Mother’s Day can be complicated, and love is in the little things.
Here are some examples of texts you can send to someone who is going through a rough time. Most importantly, just keep being there for them and let them know you are thinking of them.
Humor
How many times have you wanted to give *that* person a snippy remark after they made you feel bad, but you just couldn’t think of one at the time? Here’s the post for you.
Please... Just talk about sushi at the shmorg. Or the decor.The dresses that they are wearing. How nice it is to see cousins from the other side of the family. All about Aunt Rachel's new apartment. Your nephew's new job. What your granddaughter is learning in school.
Liz Glazer joins Aimee Baron, MD to talk about the moment when everything changed, when her daughter, Leo Pearl, was stillborn and the aftermath, and growing up not knowing if she was ever going to be able to have a family.
Infertility
Another month, another heartbreak. Sharing these words for everyone quietly carrying this weight.
If you’re in this fight too, you’re not alone. Holding space for all the shattered hopes, endless prayers, and unwavering strength.
Waiting.
Waiting.
More waiting.
For what feels like forever.
Men are half the equation when it comes to making a baby…and they carry half the heartbreak too. Just because they don’t talk about it as much, doesn’t mean that they’re not aching.
LGBTQ
Challenging norms, holding onto their values, and showing that there’s more than one way to be a family in the Orthodox world.
IUI
Holding space for this anonymous follower and all of you who feel like you’re not worthy to be in this community. You don’t know if you have a place.
Almost all infertility stories talk about the difficulty of IVF. But what about IUI (intrauterine insemination)? Here a woman writes about her feelings going through multiple rounds of IUI. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
It’s hard to put all 5,000 thoughts that run through our minds during the two week wait into one graphic. But we tried to capture the essence.
IVF
And just like that, the future we had started building fell out from under us.
The mush of feelings is exhausting 💔
So many ups. So many more downs.
Thank you to this follower for sharing her story 🫂
Men’s Resources
Men are half the equation when it comes to making a baby…and they carry half the heartbreak too. Just because they don’t talk about it as much, doesn’t mean that they’re not aching.
We asked the I Was Supposed To Have A Baby Community how the men in their life are dealing with fertility stuff. Here are some of the responses.
Ejaculatory dysfunction isn’t talked about enough, so we’re honored to share this story with the IWSTHAB community.
Mikvah, Niddah & Intimacy
This story gives an insight into one woman’s feelings as she prepares for her last visit to the mikvah (ritual bath), a necessity in orthodox communities before husband and wife reunite.
“Let me start here. Niddah makes me want to die. I have separation anxiety. Something I’ve had all my life. I was treated for it once, but I hated the meds. They had horrible side effects.”
It’s been a long time since I was in that stage of my life, the emotions and stress of mikvah night during the years when we kept losing babies come rushing back.
Miscarriage
Here are some grief books we recommend
Thank you to this follower for sharing this beautifully devastating poem 💔🫂
So many ups. So many more downs.
Thank you to this follower for sharing her story 🫂
PCOS
Shaina Glick joins Aimee Baron, MD to talk about her two children and the very different fertility journey that she had to take to have each of them, the first one that was “relatively” easy, and the other, which was much more difficult, and the years of treatments she went through and a miscarriage.
Personal Stories
Thank you so much to @sam_ster_ela for sharing her circumstantial infertility story with us. We’re holding you and everyone dealing with this pain 🫂🫂🫂
She always knew she wanted to be a mom.
Even without a partner.
Even after loss.
It hasn’t been easy — but she’s still here, still hoping, still trying.
Ejaculatory dysfunction isn’t talked about enough, so we’re honored to share this story with the IWSTHAB community.
Pregnancy After Loss
You are going to get through this.
If you’re holding your breath between appointments, you’re not alone.
Pregnancy after infertility is holding onto so many emotions
Pregnancy Announcements
There is no “right” time or way, only what is best for you.
Sharing your joy while honoring someone’s pain takes care and compassion.
How To Announce A Pregnancy To Someone Going Through Infertility
Recurrent Loss
You will always make it through
These are the voices of our community finding the strength to go on after recurrent loss.
The type of pain no one should have to experience.
Relationships and Friendships
So many of you have written about your relationships and marriages being strained through the journey of infertility or after a loss, that it’s worth mentioning here.
“I’ve never told a single soul this, but the biggest reason I don’t want to do IVF is because I don’t think my marriage is strong enough to endure it.”
“Yet, we don't have kids to play with their kids at shabbos meals, go to afternoon activities with, or go to museums with. We have tried to fit in, but maybe it's better to not even try.”
Religion and Faith
We asked our IWSTHAB community how their relationships have shifted since beginning their fertility journeys—and the responses were raw, real, and deeply human.
Infertility is hard. Pregnancy loss is hard. The journey to build a family is hard. Make sure to take breaks. You deserve them.
Send love.💗
Send support. 🤗
Send hugs 🫂
…to some of the people who need it most this holiday
Secondary Infertility
Here are some of the infertility books that we have listed there — all from authors that we’ve personally interviewed.
So many ups. So many more downs.
Thank you to this follower for sharing her story 🫂
Thank you to this incredibly brave woman for sharing her story.
Self-Care
Remember to take care of yourself during the wait… even if all you really want to do is hide in bed and take a test every hour.
All of it counts. All of it matters.
There is so so much going on right now. It’s overwhelming beyond belief. Even in the midst of this chaos, try your best to take a moment and do something to take care of yourself.
Singles
She always knew she wanted to be a mom.
Even without a partner.
Even after loss.
It hasn’t been easy — but she’s still here, still hoping, still trying.
Sometimes, the hardest part of the journey is sitting with the grief, acknowledging the feelings, and giving yourself space to process. 💔
Especially as an older single navigating decisions like egg freezing or considering becoming a single mother by choice, know that your emotions are valid and processing it all takes time. Don’t push yourself to make a decision quickly. Be gentle as you come to terms with this next stage of your life.
“I've learned so much about myself through this journey. I wish it never happened, but at the same time I have grown more than I could have imagined.”
Single Mothers By Choice
She always knew she wanted to be a mom.
Even without a partner.
Even after loss.
It hasn’t been easy — but she’s still here, still hoping, still trying.
Ellie Levi, joins Aimee Baron, MD to talk about her story of becoming a SIM: Single Intentional Mom to her 3 year old daughter, Ayelet HaShachar, her thought process and emotions about each stage of the process and the experience of being one of the first to her freeze eggs in her community.
Michelle (Malka) Grunstein, LMFT CATC-IV, joins Aimee Baron, MD to talk about how she has always known that she wants to be a mother, how she decided that by the time she was 30, if she didn't meet someone, she would take steps to do this by herself and her multiple failed relationships including a broken engagement.
Stillbirth
She always knew she wanted to be a mom.
Even without a partner.
Even after loss.
It hasn’t been easy — but she’s still here, still hoping, still trying.
We’re so excited to welcome Chaya to the IWSTHAB family. She will be taking over the Second/Third Trimester Loss Group from Lielle, and be the leader of a NEW group - Recurrent Loss - starting in May.
We’re honing in on what it really means to have a pregnancy loss.
Surrogacy
We’ve unpacked it all when it comes to surrogacy—one episode at a time.
Because let’s be real—family-building isn’t a ‘just’ situation. Every journey is unique, and kindness goes a long way.
Termination for Medical Reasons
Before you judge, pause.
These parents are already carrying more than most ever will.
Nobody Wants To Be In That Situation
I Never Thought I Would Terminate A Pregnancy for Down’s Syndrome
Third Party Reproduction
Parents who are choosing to use a donor for their child are thinking exactly the same way. They want to be parents more than they want to share their DNA.
These are some of the things that parents think about when considering using a donor (and things that other people think when you share you are going the donor route)
"We failed 11 IVF's at 4 different prominent fertility clinics with my own eggs, before we even considered donor eggs- what a difference it is going for a transfer being pretty confident that I'll end up pregnant!"
What Not To Say
One of our followers says that this line usually shuts people up pretty fast.
However you choose to respond when someone asks if you are pregnant is perfectly okay.
Stop trying to figure out people’s fertility situation when looking at someone’s body.