Perinatal Loss Resources
Perinatal loss occurs in one out of four pregnancies. Many families struggle with miscarriage, stillbirth, infant loss and infertility. The path to creating a healthy family is not a simple one and the loss of a child is profound.
This page seeks to gather resources for families struggling with infertility and pregnancy and infant loss. It provides links to organizations that support families with loss, support groups, books on infertility and pregnancy and infant loss, prayers and rituals and other support materials.
Thank you to Rabbi David Balto from the National Conference of Bikur Cholim for curating this page.
Our work began with the 2023 First Jewish Perinatal Loss Summit which the National Bikur Cholim Conference cosponsored with I Was Supposed to Have a Baby. The conference had over 200 attendees and there were presentations on:
Grappling with Loss – The Personal Stories
Time Does Not Heal All Wounds: The Wisdom of Grieving Perinatal Loss
Rituals and Prayers to Deal with the Spiritual and Emotional Challenges
There was an earlier conference on the Jewish Response to Perinatal Loss sponsored by the National Center for Jewish Healing in 2010. Here are a set of articles from that conference: A Loss Worthy of Grief, a set of articles from the National Center for Jewish Healing (2010)
Our goal is to continue to provide resources to help support families in this challenging journey. Feel free to contact us for any kind of assistance.
1. Support Including Support Groups
A. I Was Supposed to Have a Baby provides hope, closure, and empathy to a community that includes over 23,000 individuals and couples annually on their fertility journey. We leverage social platforms (Instagram, TikTok, LinkedIn, Facebook, etc.) to support all Jewish individuals and families struggling to have a child by providing a warm, nurturing space and facilitating connections to resources. We are able to offer a high-tech, cost-efficient way of reaching thousands of people through support groups, podcasts, virtual events, and countless resources. IWSTHAB is changing how the Jewish community engages in meaningful conversations about fertility and fertility-related suffering.
B. NechamaComfort is a global organization dedicated to helping all Jewish families who experience pregnancy or infant loss at any time. NechamaComfort’s services include individual counseling with trained case managers and weekly support groups including monthly men’s groups and pregnancy after-loss groups. Its services are free of charge. It also provides education and training to medical professionals, clergy, and Jewish communities.
C. National Council of Jewish Women New York, Pregnancy Loss Support Program
(providing support by professionally trained peer counselors who have also experienced perinatal loss; plus support groups and annual programs open to the public)
D. Our Love Continues (Facebook group for families that have suffered perinatal loss)
E. Knafayim (support for families suffering pregnancy loss, baby loss and reproductive trauma)
F. ATime (support for families dealing with fertility issues)
G. Uprooted (providing education, healing and support on fertility issues)
H. Hasidah (support resources and provides financial assistance for IVF)
I. The Compassionate Friends (general group for families suffering loss of a child)
J. PALS – Pregnancy After Loss Support (support groups and other resources for assisting pregnant women after loss)
2. Books, Articles and Resources
Support for Families – A Jewish Approach
Tears of Sorrow, Seed of Hope (2nd Edition): A Jewish Spiritual Companion for Infertility and Pregnancy Loss, Rabbi Nina Beth Cardin
To Mourn a Child: Jewish Responses to Neonatal and Childhood Death, Jeffrey Saks and Joel Wolowelsky (eds.)
Fertility Journeys: A Jewish Healing Guide (2018), Mayyim Hayyim
A Loss Worthy of Grief, a set of articles from the National Center for Jewish Healing (2010)
Confronting The Loss of a Baby, Rabbi Yamin Levy (1998)
First Jewish Perinatal Loss Conference, I Was Supposed to Have a Baby and National Bikur Cholim Conference (2023)
A Time to Mourn, a Time to Comfort: A Guide to Confronting the Loss of a Baby
To Mourn a Child: Jewish Responses to Neonatal and Childhood Death
Miscarriage (MyJewishLearning)
Stillbirth and Neonatal Death (MyJewishLearning)
3. Jewish Prayers/Rituals for Infant Loss
Tears of Sorrow, Seed of Hope (2nd Edition): A Jewish Spiritual Companion for Infertility and Pregnancy Loss, Rabbi Nina Beth Cardin
To Mourn a Child: Jewish Responses to Neonatal and Childhood Death – 2021 Jeffrey Saks and Joel Wolowelsky (eds.)
Ritualwell, a set of resources on perinatal loss
Prayers after miscarriage or stillbirth, Rabbi Sandy Eisenberg Sasso,
How Jewish Rituals Helped me Mourn my Miscarriage, Rabbi Jill Cozen-Harel Forward October 25, 2019
Ronens Torah, a blog by Cantor Hinda Labovitz
“A Grieving Ritual Following Miscarraige or Stillbirth” by Rabbi Amy Eilberg (1994)
“Renew Me Like the Moon: Toward Healing After Miscarriage” by Lois Dubin (1999)
“Prayer of Comfort Following a Miscarriage” by Rabbi Arnold Stiebel (2002)
4. Halachic Resources
A Guide for the Jewish Parent on Miscarriages, Stillbirths & Neonatal Deaths. The United Synagogue in the U.K.
“How to Mourn Stillbirth and Neonatal Death,” Dr. Ron Wolfson, My Jewish Learning,
Guidance on the Loss of a Baby or Fetus, Dr. Jason Weiner
Jewish Ritual Practice Following a Stillbirth, Rabbi Stephanie Dickstein
5. General Books and Articles on Infant Loss
The Bereaved Parent by Harriet Sarnoff Schiff. New York: Penguin, 1977.
Empty Cradle, Broken Heart by Deborah L. Davis, 3rd ed. New York: Fulcrum 2016.
Healing a Parent’s Grieving Heart: 100 Practical Ideas After Your Child Dies by Alan D. Wolfelt. Fort Collins, CO: Companion Press, 2002.
You Are the Mother of All Mothers: A Message of Hope for the Grieving Heart by Angela Miller. Minneapolis, MN: WiseInk, 2014.
Companioning at a Time of Perinatal Loss, Heustis and Jenkins (2005)
A Silent Sorrow, Pregnancy Loss: Guidance and Support for You and Your Family (2000) Kohn and Moffitt
Trying Again: A Guide to Pregnancy After Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Loss by Ann Douglas and John R. Sussman
Creative Healing for Pregnancy Loss: A Guided Journal of Creative Prompts to Help You Process Your Feelings, Honor Your Loss, & Begin to Heal by Hayley Wilds
Article: “Why I Haven’t Told You I’m Pregnant” by Cantor Hinda Eisen Labovitz, Ronen’s Torah, 4/6/2021.
Article: “To Those Who Love a Woman Pregnant After Loss” by Jenny Albers, A Beautifully Burdened Life, 10/6/2020.
6. Children’s Books About Loss
The Invisible String by Patrice Karst and Joanne Lew-Vriethoff, illust. New York, NY: Hachette Book Group, 2000.
We Can Make It Happen! By Jane Taubenfeld Cohen, Bea Taubenfeld Cohen, illust. and Marilyn Rose, illust. New City, NY: Kidzpoetz Publishing, 2006.
When Dinosaurs Die: A Guide to Understanding Death by Laurie Krasny Brown and Marc Brown. New York, NY: Little Brown Books for Young Readers, 1996.
Where Do People Go When They Die? By Mindy Avra Portnoy and Shelly O. Haas, illust. New York, NY: Kar-Ben Publishing, 2013.
Where’s Jess: For Children Who Have a Brother or Sister Die by Marvin Johnson. Omaha, NE: Centering Corporation, 1982.
These Precious Little People by Frankie Brunker and Gillian Gamble, illust. New York, Independent Publishing Network, 2018
7. Pregnancy After Loss Resources
Article: “Why I Haven’t Told You I’m Pregnant” by Cantor Hinda Eisen Labovitz, Ronen’s Torah, 4/6/2021.
Article: “To Those Who Love a Woman Pregnant After Loss” by Jenny Albers, A Beautifully Burdened Life, 10/6/2020.