Letter To My Friend
We ask G-d to forgive our sins during the past year and we reach out to family, friends and acquaintances with apologies as well. But what about when the person you most need to forgive is yourself?
Don’t Ask. Ever
I’ve been talking a lot about the expectations vs reality of what your life looks like. But what about families in your community? Why do we speak in hushed tones about those couples who have small families?
Hurtful Comments
But when those comments come from someone you love, you trust, you deem as “safe,” it’s much harder to do the reframing. These are the people who know the depths of your pain.
We All Care
“We care so much," - almost slips out, before it is harshly shushed by the silencing, accusing voices of "Don't say that. How can you ever care enough?”
My Marriage Fell Apart
So many of you have written about your relationships and marriages being strained through the journey of infertility or after a loss, that it’s worth mentioning here.
IVF & Marriage
“I’ve never told a single soul this, but the biggest reason I don’t want to do IVF is because I don’t think my marriage is strong enough to endure it.”
Letter To My Daughter
“An open letter to my daughter: I see you. Or at least the pieces you want me to see. I have come to your house early in the morning for weeks and weeks, and I don’t ask questions.”
Friends and Missing Out
“Yet, we don't have kids to play with their kids at shabbos meals, go to afternoon activities with, or go to museums with. We have tried to fit in, but maybe it's better to not even try.”
Partner Against IVF
My husband and I couldn’t be on more different pages. Nothing has made me hate him more.I feel so alone in this because it literally seems like no one else has this issue.
Grief With a Partner
Just because there are two people in a relationship and they go through exactly the same thing, it doesn’t mean that they will feel the same way about it, or grieve as long.
We See You
We see you. You are not a monster. You are a person just trying to get through another day in pain. You are a human being. Be kind to your aching heart.
The Other Side of Loss
Loss sends ripples through the lives of those who directly AND indirectly experience it. This voice from the community highlights how the shock and pain of loss can forever change relationships.
They Don’t Get It
Let’s just put this out there. No matter how much your partner thinks they understand, they just don’t. But they can help you get through it.
Types of Guilt In Infertility
Unfortunately, guilt is a part of infertility. It’s a feeling of having done something wrong, whether real or imagined.
Fixing is Not Healing
Healing is not fixing. These are not necessarily clear problems to be solved. Healing takes time and space and isn’t really defined by any rules. And we don’t choose trauma, [so] it’s not our weakness.
Emotions and Overwhelm
This is infertility. This is the side of infertility you may not see. The internal struggle to make it through cry day, every cycle, every event without breaking down.
The Story of A Molar Pregnancy: Dayeinu!
It would have been enough if it was just… Every part of a molar pregnancy feels like things can’t get worse than what is happening right now…. and then it does.
Personal Story of a Molar Pregnancy
Sometimes, pregnancy loss leads to the loss of other types of relationships. Lack of support and understanding from family and friends can be extremely painful and prolong the healing process.
“Our sex life totally changed when we found out we needed to do IVF/PGD to avoid the BRCA gene”
One of the things we hear over and over again is about the struggles many of you are experiencing about intimacy. Infertility and loss can change so many aspects about a relationship.
Conversations Knowing You Are a Carrier For a Genetic Disorder
Knowing you are a carrier for a genetic disorder means many potentially uncomfortable conversations in your future. If it’s you, when do you tell a potential partner?