Acknowledgement
Fertility Grief Part 1
Six times I hoped. Six times I grieved.
So when the Jewish calendar asks us to mourn destruction - I don’t need a fast day to remember what’s missing.
Fertility grief during the Three Weeks isn’t just symbolic.
It’s personal.
It’s raw.
Unhelpful comments
Spoiler alert: we don’t.
Fertility Journey
Someone else’s fertility journey isn’t the place for your dreams of grandkids, nieces, or nephews.
Read the room
Read the room. Some of us are still waiting for what you’re complaining about.
Pain changes people
We do not care that we’ve changed. Pain changes people—and we’re still here.
Mother’s Day Is Hard
Mother’s Day is hard. There’s a million questions, and barely any answers.
Who is a mother to you?
Mother’s Day Can Be Complicated
Mother’s Day can be complicated, and love is in the little things.
Nice Texts
Here are some examples of texts you can send to someone who is going through a rough time. Most importantly, just keep being there for them and let them know you are thinking of them.
How To Respond When Someone Asks “Are You Pregnant?”
However you choose to respond when someone asks if you are pregnant is perfectly okay.
Say This Instead
Don’t Say This, Say This Instead
Not Everything Happens For A Reason
Not everything happens for a reason. Some things happen, and they are horrible and awful. You could spend your life searching for a reason — you’ll never find it.
Stop Commenting on People’s Body
Bodies change during pregnancy, thats’s normal! But it’s not normal to ask someone if they are pregnant because their body has changed. Please, let’s just stop.
Stop Looking at People’s Stomachs
Stop looking at people’s stomach when you are speaking to them. You aren’t being subtle. They know exactly why are you looking there and what you are thinking.
What To Say on People On Fertility Journey
What not to say and what to say to people on fertility journey. Examples of statements that do more harm than good, and alternatives to support those on ferility journeys.
How to Talk to People Who Are Struggling with Infertility and Pregnancy Loss
How to Talk to People Who Are Struggling with Infertility and Pregnancy Loss- the guide, with “dos” and “donts” and downloadable pdf version
Nobody Has A Perfect Life
Everyone is going through something. Not the same as you, but something. No one is living a perfect life. So let’s be kind to one another, okay?
Stop Saying Never Give Up
Sometimes you need to step back and take a break. A long break. Or change course. Or try something new. Or stop trying altogether. So I beg you, fertility community- let’s stop saying, “Never give up.”
Don’t Ask. Ever
I’ve been talking a lot about the expectations vs reality of what your life looks like. But what about families in your community? Why do we speak in hushed tones about those couples who have small families?
We All Care
“We care so much," - almost slips out, before it is harshly shushed by the silencing, accusing voices of "Don't say that. How can you ever care enough?”