Do I Need Therapy?
We’ve spent a lot of time discussing many different aspects of this, touching on topics like support groups, medication, setting boundaries, toxic positivity, self care, etc.
Toxic Positivity
No matter how many times you tell someone this, it’s just not the way to happiness. It’s the same as forcing the “good vibes only” or “just keep going” shtick. It doesn’t work.
Other’s Coping Mechanisms
We shouldn't judge people's responses to pain from what they are choosing to show to the world. But... (and here's the big "but" - you knew it was coming!)
Comparing Family Size
Hold your head high and don't do the comparisons. We broke free of the slavery thousands of years ago. There is no need to willingly put yourself back there.
Family Pack
With a child or without a child. With a small family or a large family. With a partner or without a partner. You are enough. ❤️
Schlissel Challah
But what if you want to do something to get try to get a message to G-d? What if you’re searching for some kind of meaningful connection?
Ways To Say No
For when the last thing you want to do is get out of your pjs, you need to find ways of saying NO in a clear, direct and concise way.
Trauma
Because trauma is not something that you can will away. It takes time, effort, sometimes therapy and a lot of TLC. So please be kind to yourself for feeling all of these feelings.
Know Your People
Some get the fact that it’s a struggle and can relate on a basic level because they too, have been through struggle. And others just don’t. They have led a charmed life. Everything has gone right.
Suppressing Emotions
A gentle reminder that pretending not to have emotions or feelings comes at a high price that will eventually come at a cost to your mental or physical health.
First Day of School Photos
I wished, every single day, that I would just be able to hold a healthy baby in my arms. So to all of you out there who are avoiding those photos, we see you.
Guilt Versus Shame
When we feel bad about something we did (or didn’t do, we tend to experience guilt. When we feel that *we are bad* for something we did (or didn’t do). We tend to experience shame.
Pressure Categories
Pressure/Expectations that people feel usually feels like this big weight that people carry with them on a daily basis. But we think that it can be broken down into 3 main categories.
Don’t Gaslight Yourself
Quick reminder that this stuff is hard. Adding outside expectations onto the pressure you already put on yourself to have a certain number of kids, at certain intervals, is EXHAUSTING.
Questions You Ask Yourself
Have you found yourself asking any of these questions? As we gear up for our Fertility Support Summit, these are some things we’re thinking about.
Mental Health Care
When it comes to taking care of our mental health, self care, setting boundaries, and advocating for ourselves are just as important as speaking with a therapist.
Questioning Yourself
These are some of the most common comments that people say to make you question yourself, including “You are too sensitive, you are overreacting.”
When People Don’t Take You Seriously
Feeling like you aren’t being taken seriously adds to the sense of isolation and loneliness that already exists from infertility, grief, and loss.
Medical Gaslighting
Medical gaslighting is a phenomenon where individuals seeking medical care are dismissed by healthcare professionals.
Stop Gaslighting Yourself
Just like how you should not allow anyone else to gaslight you and make you feel less-than and unheard, don’t speak to yourself this way!