Halachic infertility
PSA: This next story about Halachic infertility is hard to read.
For those of you who spend every waking moment steeped in Jewish law, following its every edit with all of its nuances, it’s difficult to contemplate someone who doesn’t take it as seriously as you.
And we know that it’s probably going to be even more difficult hearing from some one who chose to turn away from Halacha (jewish law). This someone tried every possible way to stay within the confines of what the law was saying, but instead felt isolated, angered, depressed and shut down. She chose to do what she needed to do for her mental health.
And why are we sharing her story? Because IWSTHAB’s mission is to hold space, comfort and validate anyone who is struggling to have a child. And in this case, the anger and disillusionment are the emotions that need to be supported.
Also, we want to remind all of you that when you ask “How many children do you have?” you really have NO IDEA what people are going through, and how hard it is for them to get through one single day. Because if you had a window into our DM’s, you would see that this woman is not the only one who is trying her best to straddle her desire to have a family with the confines of jewish law.
Mikvah Attendent
The mikvah can be a deeply emotional experience—especially for those navigating infertility, loss, or pain. Even well-meaning comments can unintentionally cause hurt.
This post is a gentle reminder: when in doubt, keep it simple.
Be supportive. Be respectful. Most importantly, be quiet when silence is more healing than words.
That’s what Matters Most
That’s what matters most ❤️🫂
Dear Mikvah
Dear Mikvah—
Thank you @shoshanastavsky for your words. You are not alone 🫂
Mikvah Voices From The Community
For anyone who has ever dreaded the water, feared the touch, or cried alone in their car after doing “what you’re supposed to do”... You are not alone. You never were.
We’re sharing this with permission, so others might feel less invisible.
Mikvah Confessions
Mikvah Night isn’t always joyful…
“The world tells us mikvah night is magical. The night of possibility, of connection. But what if it’s also the night of pressure? Of dread? Of crying in the car on the way there because you’re scared of more disappointment? You’re not broken if it feels this way. You’re human.”
If mikvah night feels hard — what do you wish people understood?
Mikvah
Mikvah - it’s beautiful, it’s magical, it’s triggering, it’s complicated, it’s painful. It can be all of these things when you’re trying to have a baby.
Rituals
There can be comfort in the consistency of ritual.
There’s comfort in the rhythm, in the embrace of the water.
Nothing is happening at the pace I would choose, but there is an opportunity for a resurgence of hope and the possibility of new beginnings.
But there’s also pain—
the grief of dipping again when you wished this month would be different. Mikvah and taharat hamishpacha aren’t simple.
They carry both hope and heartache.
4th of July
Fireworks. Flags. Family BBQs.
And also… grief. Triggers. Feeling completely untethered.
For many in our community, July 4th isn’t about freedom—it’s about feeling trapped. In a body that won’t cooperate. In a story you didn’t choose. In a world that doesn’t understand.
We see you. You don’t owe anyone a red-white-and-blue highlight reel. Light a sparkler or don’t—your heart gets to come first.
Surviving the Two Week Wait
Remember to take care of yourself during the wait… even if all you really want to do is hide in bed and take a test every hour.
Mental Health Care
All of it counts. All of it matters.
Take Care of Yourself
There is so so much going on right now. It’s overwhelming beyond belief. Even in the midst of this chaos, try your best to take a moment and do something to take care of yourself.
Self Care Is So Much More
Self care is so much more than what you may think 💞💞💞
5 Ways You Can Set Boundaries
Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries!!!
Swipe for some practical tips on how to set appropriate boundaries for Thanksgiving and every other holiday🧡
Self-Care Is Sometimes Hard
We think that self-care is about manicures and massages and walks in nature.
And it is.
But it is also sometimes about doing hard things. Having hard conversations. Dealing with people who you don't agree with. Attending an event when you would rather stay home.
Our advice - especially when things are rough?
Think about the those things and see what needs work. It can be transformative to focus on inner work when the world is spinning out of control. Because you can't make other people do what you want, when you want it.
But you can change yourself and the way you react the events around you.
Quick self-care reminders
Quick self-care reminders
Self Care Is a Necessity
Read that book that’s been sitting on your night table. Have a conversation without getting distracted by that rectangle thing that keeps sending you notifications. Breathe. Take a walk outside.
Self-Care Tip #1
If you can find just one thing to smile about, one joke, one crazy situation, one obscenely obnoxious thing someone said to you, and actually laugh about it, your load will definitely feel a little lighter.
Self-Care Tip #2
Because even though it’s impossible to run away from your problems, it’s nice to forget about them for a while. Exploring a new location or a favorite one gets you out of your head and into an alternate reality.
Self-Care Tip #3
If you can find just one thing to smile about, one joke, one crazy situation, one obscenely obnoxious thing someone said to you, and actually laugh about it, your load will definitely feel a little lighter.