I Was Supposed To Have A Baby

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Please Keep Showing Up

“Don’t listen to the doctor.

The rabbi knows best.

Didn’t you know this is all just a test?

Just relax!

Eat more protein.

Because that’ll fix problems unseen.

“At least you can get pregnant!”

They all jump in to say.

Please, just go away.

The well-meaning mother who says,

"I KNOW you are going to have a baby one day.”

Then I guess I don’t need to pray!

“How far along were you?”

Can you justify your pain

If you’re TOO sad, please explain.

Tzedakah orgs, here we go.

Call and ask for money.

“Are you yeshivish, honey?”

“Have you called ATime?

Don’t worry - I called them for you!”

Like a good caring friend and Jew.

“I know exactly how you feel.

Because I had a miscarriage too…

Between babies number one and two.”

“There’s always surrogacy,”

Suggests the seminary friend.

Oh, do you have a uterus to lend?

“Just take a break from the doctors

And let Hashem decide!”

My soul is breaking inside.

But then there’s the moments

The texts, letters, and calls

Where I know I’m not alone after all

I’m coming over with dinner.

Here’s a massive hug.

Freshly baked cookies and a holiday themed mug.

Sending you so much love.

Here’s the Shabbos menu

My pleasure to cook for you.

This is absolutely heartbreaking.

Is there anything I can do?

I'm thinking about you.

Candles, chocolate, and fuzzy blankets

Help ease the pain,

And keep me from going insane.

You don't deserve this.

I'm holding space for you.

Your pain is not taboo.

“How are you feeling?

No need to reply.”

Thank you for listening to me cry.

Here’s the funny thing

People aren’t black and white

Some people said the worst, but also got it right.

So don’t worry about offending.

Just take the leap, the jump

And please keep showing up.”

-Anonymous