Gossip

Back to Basics Rule #2:

Gossip is never harmless.

And when you're struggling to have a child, these conversations can be even more upsetting. Because if they're talking about everyone else's uterus, they're talking about yours too.

And in our world, where there is a particular emphasis on having children, and each community/sect has a typical family size, most people in their child-bearing years are either pregnant, nursing, or raising a slew of young children. So it’s commonplace to chat about pregnancy and/or child-rearing topics.

But think for a second about the person who isn’t popping out a kid every year. Think about how alienating these conversations are for them, both on a personal level because they can’t contribute, and practically because they know you’re speculating about them when they are not around.

So please, keep your speculations to yourself. Does it really matter if you figured out XXX was pregnant before the news was public? And doesn’t the need for information supersede the mitzvah (good deed) to be nice to everyone, to be inclusive, and not to make people feel bad?

Please think before chattering.