My Anxiety:
This is a question I could answer in my sleep
Anxiety | Mental Health | Infertility
7 types of rest we ALL need
Rest is not just sleep
Every person needs different kinds of rest to truly recharge
Which kind of rest speaks to you the most?
Mental Health | Rest | Relaxation
Keep Showing Up
When people are in pain, it's too hard for them to figure out what they need, let alone reach out to someone and ask if they can do it.
So don't wait - just show up and do it.
"Do you want Chinese or pizza tonight?"
"I'm going to Trader joes and buying those cookies you like. Do you want me to grab fruit and veggies for you to have in the fridge too?"
"I'm going for a walk at 7. I will knock on your door and see if you're up for coming - if you don't respond, I will know that you're not. And then I will try again on Friday."
"I'm coming by at 9 to take your kids to Shabbat groups - don't worry if they're not dressed. I will help them."
But the biggest issue is that people forget about someone after the crisis is over. Grief and pain don't go away just because people are onto the next tragedy.
Keep showing up.
Support | Village | Being There | Fertility Journey | Jewish Woman | Jewish Family
What not to say…
If you're worried you may inadvertently hurt someone you love struggling to build their family, swipe to read what to avoid and, more importantly, what to say instead
Fertility Journey | Support System | Village
Nice texts to send
A simple text can make a world of difference to someone struggling to build their family.
But sometimes you don't know what to say.
Swipe to see some suggestions.
Support | Fertility Journey | Jewish Community
Be a Villager
Being a villager means showing up: to support and to be supported. For some of us, offering support is a challenge, and for others of us, being on the receiving end is hard.
How are you allowing others to support you in this chapter?
For people you count on, let them know about our new support group, Support Space for Friends and Family, dedicated to the support people of those struggling to build their families
Village | Jewish Community | Community Support
Understanding how to respond
Just because there are two people in a relationship and they go through exactly the same thing, it doesn’t mean that they will feel the same way about it, or grieve as long.
Typically, women grieve longer and harder than men or their partners, who do not carry the pregnancy, because it’s an event that’s happening outside of their body. They feel sad, and they grieve, but they don’t experience the physical or hormonal changes of a pregnancy or a loss. They’re one step removed. This can lead to frustration and discontent from the side that seems to be “carrying” all of the pain, and from the other side, who is often ready to move through the pain.
The disconnect is compounded by society's insistence on a time limit for grief. There’s an unwritten rule that states the shorter the pregnancy, the shorter the amount of time that you’re “allowed” to grieve. And for some, this is true; they grieve a stillbirth for a longer period of time than a chemical pregnancy.
The problem is that this doesn’t account for so many other factors.
-Maybe that chemical pregnancy was after 5 years of IVF with the only good embryo.
-Maybe everyone else is also pregnant now, and that 6-week loss is always on her mind as she compares herself with her friends.
-Maybe she was the first in the family to get married and then pregnant, but having a stillbirth means that another sibling will get the honor of having the first grandchild.
There are so many things we don’t know.
What we do know is that grief should have no limitations and that each person needs to be treated with kindness and sensitivity after a loss.
Pregnancy & Infant Loss | Grief | Marriage | Relationships | Fertility Journey
Mikvah Mantras
Before you step into the mikvah, take a deep breath and try to hold one of these truths close
Your body is more than its outcomes
Mikvah | Mantras | Self Care | Jewish Law
Reminder: Taharat HaMishpacha
When we talk about Taharat HaMishpacha (family purity laws), we often hear about the "spark" it adds to a marriage.
But for those struggling with infertility or loss, the reality is often much heavier.
The transition between states can feel like a physical reminder of a body that isn't doing what you hoped it would.
If this ritual feels more like a burden than a blessing this month, you aren't "doing it wrong." Your feelings are valid.
Taharat HaMishpacha | Halacha | Mikvah
Mikvah Feelings
To those of you who feel like you have zero energy for this mitzvah:
We see you.
Mikvah | Jewish Community | Infertility | Fertility Treatment | Pregnancy Loss | Miscarriage
Going to Mikvah this month
he mikvah is meant to be a space of transition, but when you’re waiting, it can feel like a painful monthly marker of what hasn't happened yet.
It is okay if it feels more like a chore than a spiritual moment right now.
It is okay if you feel a sense of failure, or like your body is broken.
When the world feels infuriatingly unfair, please know your feelings are valid.
Mikvah | Ritual Bath | Taharat HaMishpacha | Validation | Jewish Community
Dear Mikvah
Dear Mikvah—
Thank you @shoshanastavsky for your words. You are not alone 🫂
Mikvah | Waiting | Validation | Loss | Ritual | Community | Support
Mikvah
Standing at the door of the mikvah can feel like standing at the edge of a vast, painful silence.
It is incredibly heavy to bring a heart full of disappointment to a space that is often associated with new beginnings and hope.
When your body feels like it has let you down, stepping into those waters can feel less like a spiritual reset and more like a confrontation with what is missing.
If you are struggling to find your way back to that space tonight, or any night, please know:
• Your anger and your hurt are allowed to exist, even in holy spaces.
• You do not have to "fix" your feelings before you immerse.
• It is okay if the only prayer you have right now is a question.
Mikvah | Ritual Bath | Taharat HaMishpacha | Faith | Body Grief | Struggles | Community | Jewish Life | Support
Don’t comment on people’s bodies
Don't comment on people's bodies.
Don't comment on people's bodies.
Don't comment on people's bodies.
Mikvah | Ritual Bath | Taharat HaMishpacha | Jewish Community | Infertility
Months Together: Mikvah Edition
The relationship with the mikvah (ritual bath) changes so much when month one turns into month twelve.
What starts as a new ritual can quickly become a monthly reminder of what hasn't happened yet. It is a lot to ask of a person—to show up, to prepare, and to find meaning in a cycle that feels like it’s breaking your heart.
It is possible for this mitzvah to feel both holy and heavy at the same time.
Mikvah | Infertility | Jewish Life | Waiting | Monthly Cycles | Support | Community
TTC
The next fertility acronym we are breaking down is... TTC.
Fertility journey | ttc | waiting | pregnancy test | pregnancy after loss | infertility support
7 Daily Journal Prompts
Sometimes the heaviest thoughts are the hardest to say out loud, but they can feel a little lighter once they’re on paper
We’re sharing a selection of journal prompts over the next two weeks to help you navigate this season
If you’d like to have all 30 days of prompts and ready-to-use pages, you can find it at the link in bio and in stories ❤️
Processing | Healing | Journaling | Support | Community | Hope | Self Care
DPO
DPO… “Days past ovulation”
Also known as: Days spent analyzing symptoms and asking if it’s too soon to test.
Fertility Acronyms | Infertility Support| Self Care | Pregnancy Loss | Pregnancy After Loss | Grief | TTC
AF
What does AF mean to the fertility world?
Textbook definition vs realistic definition
TTC | fertility acronyms | fertility journey | infertility community | AF | infertility support
My heart can hold…
Navigating infertility shows us that our hearts are often much larger and more resilient than we give them credit for.
It can feel confusing to carry the weight of a deep ache in one hand and a spark of hope in the other.
Every emotion has its place. Swipe to read through this piece about holding space for it all.
Validation | Hope | Grief | Both And | Community | Support | Healing