You Can Survive
“I got married 4 years ago to the love of my life. We grew up around the corner from each other and have always been in each other’s lives because our families are close.
I still remember the day when my mother asked me if I had ever considered dating him. I was shocked! I had gone on dates with guys from other cities and other countries, but I never considered the one who was right here. But once I started thinking about it, I knew that he was the one.
My husband is my closest friend and my rock. Since we got married in our late 20s, we started trying right away, never thinking there would be an issue. But there was.
In four years, we have been through 6 IUIs, 5 IVF retrievals, 12 frozen transfers, 4 pregnancies, 3 miscarriages (1 at 6 weeks, 1 at 9 weeks, and one that made it to 18 weeks), and I am finally holding my 3 week old son. And we have no diagnosis. It’s all just unexplained.
It’s been so so hard. I’m not getting younger, and with each retrieval, I’ve gotten fewer and fewer eggs, which means fewer good embryos. I’ve had OHSS (ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome) after one of them, so they can’t push the meds too high.
I’ve been moody, angry, bloated, nauseated, bitchy, silly, crazy, and weepy, and sometimes all at the sane time. I’m hungry and not hungry. I want to be hugged and I want no one to touch me. I demand to have sex because I need to feel close, and then I push him away because I can’t stand another person poking and prodding at me.
We’ve missed job interviews, board meetings, family get-togethers, weddings of dear friends, college reunions and trips overseas because of this. Friends stopped speaking to us and we also stopped speaking to some of them because they just didn’t get it.
But, I’m here to tell you that you CAN survive. I don’t know how I did it, but I did. The pain and anxiety was crippling so many times. But I’m here.
And I’m telling you this: The last four years have been really rough, but I’ve learned that no matter how terrible it may seem, I can and will get through it.”
- sent in by a follower, just yesterday, who told me that she was so moved by all the stories of kindness, she felt compelled to share this.❤️