“Tonight, I had the dreaded back to school night.

I never realized how horrible it was. I never got to go to one before because of covid.

So I went tonight now that my sons in a ‘big kid’ school for nursery. It runs from ages 3 to middle school.

I didn’t realize how triggering it could be.

Every director asked, ‘How old are yours?’ implying there are multiples. All the other parents started naming off their kids’ ages and grades, all perfectly spaced 2 years apart. There were parents bonding over having multiple kids the same age. 

I realized I am the only one in the room with a 3 year old, and only a 3 year old. 

It’s funny - you don’t realize how an event may possibly throw you off until you experience it. Secondary infertility and RPL (recurrent pregnancy loss) really take the excitement out of milestones for your current child that are supposed to be exciting. ”