Infertility: Forever Waiting

“I'm forever waiting.
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Waiting to have the money to continue with IVF.
Waiting to be set up with the right doctors.
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Waiting, forever waiting.
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When will I be able to release my breath? ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I’m forever waiting for the chance to add to my family.

When will the time be right?
When will Hashem (G-d) hear me crying out to him in pain, calling to Him from the depths of my heart and soul?
Can He hear me?
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Waiting.
I’m forever waiting.
Waiting is trying my patience.
Waiting is unbearable.
I feel like I’m forever waiting.
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Waiting for that phone call that broke my heart and spirit.
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And now, the waiting starts from the beginning.

Waiting for my body to heal.
Waiting for Covid-19 to end.
Waiting to see if my doctors office will slowly open up again.
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I’m waiting, forever waiting.
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I can feel it this time.
Something about this waiting period feels different.
Has Hashem (G-d) finally heard my pleas?
Will He release me from this waiting game?
Will I get the chance to release my breath
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Waiting. I’m forever waiting.
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But I know I'm not waiting alone.”