I Am Angry at G-d

“Have you been angry with God recently? I know I have.
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Angry that I lost my pregnancy.
Angry that He allowed me to get pregnant when He was just going to take it from me.
Angry that my husband lost his job due to COVID.
Angry that the country [the author lives in Israel] is heading into another lockdown.
Angry that all my tefillos (prayers) and crying and pleading seem to be going on deaf ears.
Angry that this pandemic has turned this world into total chaos.
Angry that there seems to be no end in sight.
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Yes, I’m angry at God.
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I used to think that made me a bad Jew, but truth is it just makes me human.
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God gave us all different emotions for us to use them.
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To process how we feel.
To express ourselves.
To grieve.
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Just because I’m angry, doesn’t mean I’m not grateful for all the good He has blessed me with.
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I’m angry at God.
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And as a Jew, I know He loves me even when I’m angry at Him. And even though I’m angry at Him, He still continues to shower me with His love.
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I may sometimes have a hard time seeing Him, but He’s always there, and that in and of itself is my comfort.”

Sent in by @shoshanastavsky