Tisha B’av Reminds Us We Don’t Always Have To Look On The Bright Side

I love Tisha B’av. I know it’s crazy to say that, but I do.

I work in the grief and loss space all year long, and sit with people’s pain. I hold space for the tears, the anguish, and the grief. I am witness to so many people’s private days of mourning.

But today, it’s a national day of mourning.

Everyone cries. We yearn for the lost. We mourn over the destruction. We read story after story of the calamities that happened on this day in history.

But the rest of the year, the world smiles. People laugh and celebrate. And if there is a brief moment of pain, people stop, but they get up and move on with their lives pretty quickly.

Because it’s hard to sit in pain.

It’s normal to want to numb bad feelings.
It’s normal to want to run from the things that hurt.

But the pain will catch up with you eventually; you can’t outrun it forever. And, if you don’t allow yourself to feel, it will find you, often when you least expect it.

So I love Tisha B’av because it reminds me that we are not alone in our pain. It’s a day when an entire nation grieving our redemption. Collectively, we yearn for things to be different. Together we sit in sadness and hope for the future.

I pray that all of us will find community when we grapple with unimaginable pain, but more than that, I hope we will all be delivered from this pain very soon.