"176 million women live with endometriosis and I am one of them.

To me, this enigmatic and commonly misunderstood disease is a symbol of so much more than a simple illness. The mere utterance of the word ‘endometriosis’ unfurls within me a tangled web of sour resentments and acidic regrets that have been left to marinate for far too long. Paradoxically, it also serves as an emblem of resilience and strength, renewal and hope, that I wear proudly affixed to my soul.

I suffered from the debilitating symptoms of endometriosis (or ‘endo’ for short) for ten years before learning that the disease even existed. At first, they were minimal: painful periods and chronic fatigue. It wasn’t until I got married at 19 that new symptoms arose. I discovered on my wedding night that having sex made me feel like I was being sliced open by shards of glass. A single miscarriage early on in our marriage was followed by years of devastating infertility. By age 25, the pain that I had previously felt exclusively during my period became more intense and invasive. It was as if my abdomen and pelvis were encased in electrically charged barbed wire that sent shocking waves of agony up and down my body. Crushing fatigue made me feel like I was running through quicksand, my brain wrapped in cellophane, my eyes covered in cement. I was a new mother to two miraculous children but could barely take care of myself.

I dragged myself from one doctor to the next in a desperate attempt to be taken seriously. My life became a cycle of disappointment; escalations of anticipatory hope dissolving into abject despair, after being dismissed once again. I was misdiagnosed, mistreated, gaslit, ignored, and mocked...I began to wonder if I was actually having symptoms at all."

We thank @rachel_daar_cohen for sharing her story and @thelayersproject for allowing us to repost it